Re: Re[2]: Educational brainstorming -Reply

C Swift (
Mon, 1 Jun 1998 18:43:37 -0700

> Here's what I was trying to ask. We have two couples, both without
> children. One in which the woman stays home and slaves there while the
> slaves over a fourty hour job, and one in which the opposite happens.
> what do you think about both couples. It would seem to me that the man
> stayed home would be seen as somewhat of a "failure" because he has to
> depend on the wife to earn the money by society and by our culure,
> the woman staying at home would be accepted more.
> ,dP""d8b, John Meyer

John, I think in decades past this might be true, but I believe things are
changing. Changing in two ways: First, I don't think people look kindly
on anyone who stays home for no particular reason (like raising children)
and does nothing. On the other hand, I've seen the situation you describe
work both ways -- In fact, one couple I knew tried it one way (she stayed
home) then the other (he stayed home) and the degree of respect, or lack
thereof, seemed to depend on what other things the stay-at-home person was
doing (i.e. volunteering, going to college, working part-time, etc.). A
neighbor of mine has a stay-at-home, self-employed husband (works from
home) who does much of the housework and the laundry, gets the cars
serviced, some of the shopping... while she works away from home and is the
primary income-earner. No one I know seems to care ... but most of my
friends are female. Could it be that men, because of their socialization,
would be more critical of this? There are probably a lot of variables.
Carla Swift

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